Before you read it - start reading anad read it to the end or don't read it. You could have only partial image about myself and that can be harmful :-) Also - at the end are described some ways to contact me.


    So ... what could you await ? These pages are certainly written by some freak, who's sitting whole day by his computer and never gets out of his lair - So it's useless to be interested about him. Well, the reality is (luckily for me) a bit different.

    Mommy and daddy :-) call me Lukas (once they got this weird idea and since that moment ...) But other friends do call me "luky" or "swine". Now, i'm about 19. (born 15. 5. 1985 - lots'o fives :-)) Some clever people told me my sign is taurus. I don't exactly know - maybe i'm supposed to have tough head :-)

    Next, a bit ... My weight is about 65 kg (1 kg is weight of liter of water), 185 cm tall, wearing suntanned skin (monitor radiation) and short spiky hair (doesn't get to the keyboyard and at the morning one don't have to do anything with them). I like riding a bike, swimming, some activities with girls and of course computers. In winter (when drunk) coasting, sometimes running and sometimes i visit gym center. Sometimes i turn to electronics, Tesla coils ...


Tell you ... to get a girl, nice and same height can be quite a problem. So we are mostly occupying stairs ... :-) For the less sport activities - parties (techno, jungle, drum and bass), lan-parties and every year you can (not recomended) see me at the Summer of Love in Czech rep. / Pardubice (till retirement or death)

    Now, a bit about my darling :-) My mostly polycarbonate body (silicon-based electronic implants - can't afford organic based + don't know anyone to connect them properly ...) is tortured with 15" monitor (85 Hz). In the box is AMD Athlon XP 2000+, Asus A7V8X board with SATA, Gb lan ..., tiny (10GB) harddisc and 1024 Mb 333 Mhz DDR and GeForce FX 5700. Harddisc is going to be replaced with raid0 array (two 80 Gigs hdds) I have ball (= not optical) mouse and Win98 SE (i found it fastest and most stable)


    When speaking about music, i already mentioned techno, jungle and dnb or trance, rock. A few people won't be pleased if i say i don't like disco - but when going to get drunk - i don't care. Most of interprets i'm listening to are czech, but you could know some like ed Rush, Orbital, Inigo Keneddy, Afrika Islam, Alien ant farm, Limp Bizkit or Underworld. My favorite films are Matrix (rather the first one, the next ones weren't so good ...) Lord of the rings, Star Wars (including the crazy parody which name i can't remember), Tron, Monsters inc, Shrek, Ice age, Aliens, Scary movie, Fast and furious, next Braveheart, or mr. Bean films and russian Mrazík. I play MP3-s only with Sonique (lots of skins / visualisations) No Winamp !! or with Traktor (Native Instruments) For films i have nice skinned RadLight ...


That was Traktor. This is Sonique and RadLight :


    My favorite games ... Unreal Tournament 1, 2004 (and Unreal 1, 2). My opinion is that UT 2003 is spoiled. Cool graphics, but zero fun. I rather like the old Tournament. Of course Quake 3 Arena, like a model of my gfx engine :-) Total singleplayer is still Half-Life. It simply rocks. I don't know why, maybe the perfect atmosphere and story ... Now i'm trying to play Counterstrike with AK47 (russian Kalasnikov) For some arcades : Rollcage (one of few games with good second part), Serious Sam ][, Return to castle Wolfenstein and old animated Neverhood !!!. I was born in age of Atari (i also started coding) Montezuma, Ghostbusters, Necromancer, Frogger, Moon Patrol, Defender ... That's lots of names (i'm beggining to feel i'm not doing anything else ;-)).

    Some different stuf. I like thin, small girls, blonde, brunettes or red-haired (when i'm thinking about it - i don't care) The main is nice face and shape and a bit of intellect. Don't like smoking girls. Well - and drinks. Beer, some better wine (never ever paperbox), vodka, distilled plums and of course - body needs water - so some sweet-water drinks. ... I would nearly forgot Tequilla !!

    I'm living in modest cottage with house number 1 in small village Makov, Czech republic. We have one hybrid dog, one hybrid and one normal cat, two goats and 256 mouses. I'm about to go to university to study some graphics stuff.

    In 2002 we were with school in Croatia. When we got to the camp and got our tents ... we began to drink. I finished in tent with these people :


Yes, from left to right (left is the side where usually command promt begins - don't know how about arabian one ...). Pinky, our "edge" and owner of the slowest known computer. Me. No comment. Kobliha, or in croatian language "krafna". Boris, my cd-writerdonor. ZAreZ, good in school, better with girls ... Yes - and it was photographed by Ladha the Borg (you will be elliminated, the resistence is furtile !). He got so drunk, he was unable to be photographed (and resistence was furtile). When got our precents of blood in alcohol, we went to see local landscape (and toalets)


It was looking well so we went swimming. Then we went to cook some dinner. I took some instant dumplings and bag of cacao. I became well know because of that instant shit. We wanted to photograph that, but lenses got broken - and when i took it to the Czech republic to scan it, it wasn't quite similar like before in Croatia. We also run out of drinks, we bought local "rakija" .. how to describe it. It is 80 % of deadly methylalcohol, some alcohol and rest is water. It's more like spirit. Everyone (especially Borg) got pretty drunk, one of my best friends, called Moudras ("Wiser" ?) was playing guitar and we were happy. Our teachers were already drunk and didn't bother us. At the morning it was necessary to create billboard to mark the tree to vomit.


There is sign "Warning - wild ducks" Teachers wanted even againist alcohol rush realize the original idea - to have sport course in Croatia. So - we formed group called "Cripplebox", lost all matches we had to play as fast as possible and went swimming. (the wise saying - the smarter one escapes) The water was cool, we were collecting shells and so on. We invented the "Pearl harbour" simulation when someone got into water, the others let him swim and then started throwing little stones to him. We were actually quite sun-burned in the evening (because noone risked going to the water - and after five o'clock neither under the shower on the beach) We decided to cure it with the very traditional medicine so noone remember lot from that evening ... The fact is that some perverse guys went to bother some younger girls form another school. It was actually quite a jam. (the campkeeper was solving that) Once we went arround the pub and a strong voice coming from inside commanded "throw anus" (sorry for translation ... i have certain feeling it's completely wrong) So we got in and the campkeeper paid us a glass of quite good wine. He said the pledge with raised finger, saying "at least the finger is errected" and then felt under the table. Really cool man. Next day (like the other days) our Cripplebox lost all matches and went to the water. We were hoping for a solace price (and imagined how angry will the others who were playing be) Swimming. The bus, full of Slovakian girls of our age arrived and we were starting to connect, first with binoculars (serial line) and afternoon (enforced with beer) even the parallel line at the beach. Fortunately arround the beach were lots of tiny caves and Slovak girls were quite good-nature configurated. Next day, the trip to near island was planned. First noone wanted to go, mainly because of money, but at the last moment someone said "nudistic beach" and the little boat had problem to stick out of shore. The sailors offered us some home-made drink, we drank experienced from coffee tumblers. The sailors had problems to handle their jaws, but after retaking control over control device went back to cabin. The island was quite boring, just rocks and water with seaweed. On the nudistic beach were just our filthy mistresses. But at least i'm well suntanned. One look at the sea :


(camp is lying under these mountains) The rest of day was spent by swimming drunk, saving these who were too drunk (or too asleep) to swim and learning to speak slovak or french. My friend ZAreZ invented the wind theory : "Single molecule of water weights thousand of molecules of wind. So when the sea is rippling, the wind originates" You can see the state we were :-) The course was about to end, but we wanted to explore the mountains above the camp. We hadn't any guide, because the last one died after bite from snake or something of that kind. But the hunger made us to go out from camp to steal some potatoes (we had no more money since the food wasn't extra cheap and the drinks as well) It didn't look bad and as far as i know we returned all (i.e. the same count as on the way there)


We cooked some soup and got sober. We had to drink our stores of drinks and the whole situation gradually steamed up. Some kittens from Czech rep. arrived last day, but after such drinking noone cared. But above the mountains was terrific steam and as we were drunk, we resolved to climb to the edge of steam at least. So, equipped with highland sandals we went to mountains. When we got (according to later informations of campkeeper) to the three hundred meters, the slope of poured stones appeared in front of us. It was at least fifty degrees dip. (it's not very visible from picture, it's been taken almost straight up in order to see steam) After some arbitrating we allowed ourselves fifty precent people-loss and got climbing stones. We tactically split into two groups to better approximate losses. When climbing up, we've seen arround twenty labels with names of dead climbers. After some climbing we sucessfuly reached the edge of steam and the second group got lost somewhere in shrubs.


Quite high, isn't it ? We were told it will be arround five hundred meters. Somewhere down there is our camp. But upstairs was quite freezy so make pictures and run down.


These dots in the center is me and Pospishill, the second group unluckily hadn't zoom :-) The rocks behind us were almost vertical ... So we began "rolling barrels" and jumping. Almost healthy (with bumps and stripped skin) we slipped on avalanche of stones, made checksum and ran to the camp. When got to the bus, it almost immediately started to rain. We could only laugh to wet girls that arrived to be there for the next week. Supply didn't fail and kind drivers had czech beer. On the way back we were singing national songs like "attract gorilla" or "grazed gooses" (some people began calling me announcer, who knows why ...) :-) That was really crazy holiday.

    You can imagine how the life in our country is. If you would like to chat, get ICQ (or Miranda / whatever with ability to do ICQ ...), you cand find me under the nick "-tHE SWINe-" and czech rep. or number 200339454. Well - i hope i didn't discouraged you from further reading of my pages :-)

    -tHE SWINe-

CCCP
     after some e-mails i found out you think i'm notorious junky, but it's not true ! maybe sometimes i have something with friends, but it's not offen and i would be pretty swine not to have, when everyone other is enjoying ...

CCCP
     by "CCCP" i mean "post scriptum" / "PS"

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